Cash

Cash - Sudden Revelations

CASH - ARE WE RIGHT OR WHAT?

Yes, last night all one hundred and six of us got on an airplane and flew to the north pole... We connected with the polar bear - your totem animal and he laid it all out for us. We didn't pet them or anything, we kind of just sat in a circle and chanted and got high. We took out your picture and began chanting cash, cash, cash...

We hadn't planned on that you see! It's all a marvelous union of the spirits... We didn't even know that we were going to go to the north pole until we got to the airport and took out your picture and compared it to the recent photo of you taking out fast cash ... It has nothing to do with that stone-cold look in your eyes but with the polar bear totem... It seems to reach out of your eyes and swipe our heads with it's bear claws and we know what you need to do: introspect. Yes, like the bear you must introspect and hibernate! Hibernate on this - instead of worrying about all your problems - get a payday loan and solve all your short-term problems.

• When you need cash for whatever reason - don't cry! Get a payday loan!
• If your car has broken down - get a cash advance instead of begging for a loan from your uncle chuck!
• If your girlfriend is begging for a vacation and is threatening to leave you - get a cash advance and get going... or break up with her- she'll never be happy.
• If you can't find a better job - get payday loans to solve all your cash problems.
• When you want to visit your bear friends in the North Pole - get cash advances to fund your journey.
• When you need cash - the best thing to do, of course, is to save your money in the first place.

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